P.People kill themselves. This is the complexity of the human condition, the human mind. However, because of the victim’s emotional and mental miscalculations, we cannot be immune to suicide. Are you suicidal Someone you know Read this …
Then there is the feeling of frozen helplessness and hopelessness that come so quickly for some. It’s not about weakness and it certainly isn’t about selfishness.
Hard issues, I know. But we have to do this because suicide has become a major by-product of the pandemic. It was actually on the rise.
If you think about it, why shouldn’t we be talking about suicide here?
If this were a cancer support agency, don’t you think we’d have our heads in the sand if we didn’t talk about death and dying? Depression, anxiety, mania, loneliness, helplessness, hopelessness, despair – cancer. All potentially fatal, all in the same boat.
Check out “Andre” above. Here is his story …
Andre has more to do than a seemingly nasty headache. He was diagnosed with major depression 10 years ago and has been taking an antidepressant ever since. After his diagnosis, he took part in therapy for a year. But since he was feeling much better, he left it behind – although he still had his “moments”.
Andre is an emergency room nurse so he has an ongoing relationship with COVID-19. And it’s an intimate relationship because he tested positive and hit three months ago.
Most of all, Andre is an average person like you and me. And despite his familiarity with the virus and how it works, it scares him
However, what is really shaking his world is the change in his definition of “normal”. For Andre, the loss of order is extremely difficult to bear. Social distancing, bans, masks, isolation, constant news coverage, inconsistent facts, political struggles – this is not his world.
Of course, his depression makes the chaos all the more unbearable.
So, yeah, Andre has more than a bad headache. In fact, he decided he was out of here. Andre wants to die. He has had suicidal thoughts in the past but never said a word. However. This time he goes beyond pure thinking. He knows how and when he will do it. It’s called a plan. Andre is serious.
This is how suicide often works.
Anytime can be the “right” time to commit suicide. However, at times like these it hits a flash point.
By the way, the pandemic may be the biggest factor for Andre, but there are so many other suicidal stressors out there these days. I bet you could at least quickly make a short list.
But why suicide? I mean there is no going back. If the attempt is successful, it is over. Done.
First, let’s remember that chronic and acute emotional / mental misery can play an important role. And a diagnosed disorder like Andre’s doesn’t need to be involved. Even an average dose of, say, disaster at a vulnerable moment can be fatal.
Then there is the feeling of frozen helplessness and hopelessness that come so quickly for some. It’s not about weakness and it certainly isn’t about selfishness. It’s just that we all have different cup sizes – capacities for stress. If the beaker overflows, anything can happen. For many, it’s the ultimate loss of control. And that cannot be taken into account.
Look, whatever the basis, it so often comes down to statements like this for yourself and others: “I have run out of options.” “I don’t know what else to do.” “I get the help I need when I’m lucky enough not to succeed.” “I lost my hope.”
There really is so much more, but I think you got the idea.
What about you?
Yes, people are killing themselves. But I don’t want you or anyone you know to die.
Did you relate very personally to Andre’s circumstances? Feel like someone you know can? If the answer is yes, it is time to take action.
After you get some insight into the fact that you are unlikely to be thinking and feeling clearly and fairly, it is time to let someone know. Friend, partner, spouse, family member, advisor, clergyman – someone.
However, if you have a problem with anonymity, call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 800.273.8255 (TALK). Local hotlines may also be available to you.
How about we end things in the words of the jumper and survivor of the Golden Gate Bridge, Ken Baldwin?
I immediately realized that everything in my life that I thought was unfixable was completely fixable – except that I had just jumped.
Well you read that. Please take it to heart.
Oh Andre? At the end of his shift, he went to the door. His gun was waiting at home. The on-call social worker just left at the same time. When she knew Andre, she could feel that something was going on. She made Andre sit down with her on a bench outside. And it wasn’t long before Andre shed his courage in tears …
He went back inside with the social worker.
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